Archive for Time
Getting Out of the House in the Morning
Posted by: | CommentsA tale of two mornings
Her alarm goes off. She hits the snooze. Stayed up too late last night. The alarm goes off, she hits the snooze again. The third time the alarm clock almost ends up being thrown, but instead she grudgingly gets out of bed.
She quick checks her email, facebook, pinterest before realizing now she has to rush to get the kids and herself ready. She sets the kids down in front of the TV with a bowl of cereal while she quick takes a shower after rushing to find an outfit.
When she gets out, kids haven’t made any progress yet on getting ready. They got sucked into the TV. She yells for them to get a move on. She decides there is no time for grooming and just slaps some lipstick on. She wrangles the kids who are looking for a shoe, a backpack and a lunch.
They are going to be late. She decides she will just have a coffee for breakfast on the way. As if she wasn’t wired enough. But, she feels so tired. She drives a little too fast and has a couple close calls. By the time she gets to work or her appointment she is frazzled.
In the house next door, her alarm goes off before the kids wake up. She gets up thinking of something she is looking forward to during the way to pry herself out of bed. She has a regular bedtime, so it’s easier for her to get up in the morning. Even if she doesn’t get "everything" done she wants to the night before, she knows how important sleep is to her day.
She centers herself with prayer or meditation before a quick walk or a little yoga. The kids wake up and start working on their get ready checklist. Breakfast and their clothes are laid out the night before. There are a few nudges to get back on track. When they are done, then they are able to watch TV if they want.
She grabs the clothes she laid out the night before. She takes a quick shower thinking a good outcome for this day. She peeks out to see how the kids are doing, does a little managing then gets her grooming done.
Only then does she check her phone for the news and peeks at her email while eating her breakfast.
They have time to chat as they get coats and backpacks on and get in the car. They know they aren’t going to be late, so there is an easy-going conversation (and a few "he’s touching mes"). After dropping the kids off, she is on her way.
Which house sounds more like your house in the morning? Are there any tweaks you can make to create a calmer morning?
How Green is Your Grass?
Posted by: | Comments“If the grass is greener on the other side it’s probably getting better care.” – Earl Nightingale
Ouch, but it’s true most of the time. We like to think some people were born lucky, and it’s not fair and everything should be easy. But, as a general rule the person you are jealous of has worked very hard.
Which is good, because that means we can do it, too. If it’s only about luck or right connections we don’t have a chance. But, if it’s about doing the work – we can do it.
It also mean you have a choice. Is the time it takes to do the work, worth it to you? Maybe you’d love to be extra fit and run marathons. But are you willing to put in the work and time? You’d love the house to always look great, but do you want to put in the work and time to get it that way? In your heart, what are your true priorities?
Does everything have to be done to the perfectionistic standards? Or can you let go of some of that?
That person you are jealous of because of their great cooking, or powerful career may not have a perfect house or may have 20 pounds they’d love to lose.
No one has the time or energy to be excellent at everything. Becoming masterful takes a lot of time. So some things we do can be average. Or even below average.
Does that idea freak you out? Don’t worry, that’s just your ego talking.
Make your choices based on your strengths, not your ego. What are you going to water so your grass will be green?
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Photo by Designs by Kari
Changing Your Relationship with Time
Posted by: | CommentsRe: New Time Class- Limited Room – March 5, 2012
Attention: Hurried, overwhelmed individuals with too much too do and not enough time to do it
Ask yourself: do you want to live your life in a constant state of hurry and worry?
When it comes to time, have you tried system after system but nothing works?
Or do you keep all your to dos in your head hoping you don’t forget anything?
Or worse, have a time system that takes so much time to manage you wonder if it’s even worth it?
We all want to feel in control of our time, but how do you do it?
I’ve had some questions about the above time class, I thought I’d answer here.
1) What if I can’t make the classes?
About half of the class members don’t make classes. You will get a transcript of each of the classes, the lessons and the workbook. And you can email me any questions you want. Classes are 8pm Eastern. To find your time zone click here.
2) I’ve never done a chat room. That technology makes me a little scared.
It’s simple, simple, simple. Once you login as a guest or register with a user name and password you pick out, you go to the chat room. Then you type in the box and click to submit. Easy as sending an email.
3) Help, I have to many to dos and I don’t know what to do next!
I thought Time Management was the answer. If only I could plan my time well enough and do enough multi-tasking, it would be "enough." I wrote articles with time tweaks and tips which help, but didn’t solve the underlying problem.
I’ve gone through Franklin planners, Bubble planners, Day Timers, a huge monthly calendar, Remember the Milk, numerous online or computer time programs. But, I didn’t stick with many long.
Why?
I didn’t stick with any because when my to dos got to be so many, the program became overwhelming. So I’d quit and start fresh with a new program.
What I didn’t realize was that it wasn’t the program that was the problem. It was my whole relationship with time.
Changing the relationship
For the past couple years, I have gone from seeing time as a tyrannical task master to seeing time as an abstract concept. It’s fluid and subjective.
Now:
- I rarely rush even when I think I will be late.
- I no longer have to do lists that seize me up as soon as I look at them.
- I know the difference between Soft Time and Hard Time
- My priorities are actual priorities
- I listen to my intution more when finding my next to do
- I have quit my over-planning tendency
Just the other day a friend and I were lost in Grand Rapids, MI. She said, "I am so glad you aren’t getting all upset that we will be late for the concert." Time just isn’t a concept I like to get upset about anymore.
Enroll in the 4-Week "Change Your Relationship with Time" Class Now – Limited Room – starts March 5, 2012
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$37 |
You can find out more info on the class here: Change Your Relationship to Time
Weekly Simplicity Tips
Posted by: | CommentsWelcome to this week’s issue of Weekly Simplicity Tips. This weekend we commemorated the 1 year anniversary of my 18 year old son’s death. I am so thankful for the support of my family and friends.
- Where do you need to follow your soul?
- Take care of one unfinished business that is weighing you down.
- Think of your work (home or out of the home) with gratitude. What does your work provide you?
- Take a look at your goals or intentions you set at the beginning of the year. Do something to move a goal forward.
- Where have you overloaded your schedule unnecessarily?
- Work with the time you have, instead of idealizing the perfect day.
- Every hour ask yourself if this is the most important thing you could be doing right now.
Solutions
Change Your Relationship to Time Class
Attention: Hurried, overwhelmed individuals with too much too do and not enough time to do it
Ask yourself: do you want to live your life in a constant state of hurry and worry?
When it comes to time, have you tried system after system but nothing works?
Or do you keep all your to dos in your head hoping you don’t forget anything?
Or worse, have a time system that takes so much time to manage you wonder if it’s even worth it?
We all want to feel in control of our time, but how do you do it?
My goal is to help you change your relationship with time.
http://www.encouragingcoach.com/programs-timecourse.html
Letting Go of Time Fillers
Posted by: | CommentsToday is the beginning of lent, a great time to re-evaluate how you spend your time. People are talking about giving up things. The original purpose was to give up things to strengthen your self-discipline and to make room in your life for extra praying, fasting and giving.
What in your life is not contributing to your life? What can you let go of to make room for what matters? What do you waste time doing too often?
Some people are talking about giving up Facebook, Pinterest, news, TV, magazines, gaming, complaining or gossip.
If you let go some something, what would have have time for? One person I know if giving up facebook to have more time to do things she loves to do like sew and get out into nature. Another is using the time to help her sister plan her wedding. Maybe you could re-discover your spiritual life. Or learn to cook. Or gather with friends more often. Or declutter. Or catch up on your reading. Maybe you could discover what volunteering would light you up.
What are you longing for in your life?
How different would your life be if you gave up the easy time fillers for some real renewal in your life? Even for just a little time. What are you going to do?
Excuse Me, Your Balance is Tilting
Posted by: | Comments
I broke one of my rules the other day by talking about balance (for your Christmas break). In general, I stay away from the word balance.
The problem is it’s so elusive. How do you know when you are in balance? Do the hours have to match up perfectly? Are you getting everything done you want? Is it balanced every day? Every week? Every month? Who decides when you are in balance?
Balance is another word for perfectionism to me. "If I am thin, emotionally aware, serving, doing great at mothering and/or my work, have outstanding relationships, have a beautiful home then I am in balance."
And we never feel we are doing great at even just one, much less all of them. We are all out of balance most of the time. There is always something different we could or should be doing.
I know when my kids were little that was my main focus. Sometimes the house got cleaned, sometimes we took long walks together. Sometimes I got a shower, sometimes I got food on the table. Sometimes they took a long enough nap to get a project done, sometimes I took a nap too.
People get sick, work projects have deadlines, and life in general is chaos.
So what is better than searching for balance?
Checking in with moments.
Asking yourself, "What do I need right now?" and "What’s the next, right thing to do?"
You can create a check in jar to help you.
When you listen to your inner guidance, you are led to the truer things to do for you. Which may or may not lead to balance.
Fulfilling lives are rarely balanced.
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Photo by: CogDog
Getting it All Done on Break
Posted by: | CommentsSo you want to get it all done this break from work? I suggest – don’t.
Most of my clients have super big goals for this week. So I have had to talk some of them down. Vacation time is not only to get your home back in shape, it’s to recover and to spend time with your family.
Check your to do list, is there a balance? Not perfect balance because that is elusive and doesn’t really exist. But, a simple balance.
Do you have home projects on the list, like decluttering the bedroom or getting through some paper piles? Have just a couple on the list and once those are done you can always add more. After all, I am sure there is already some cleaning up from the holidays that also needs to get done.
How about family activities? Maybe visiting the grandchildren, taking the kids to the movies, or having a family game night. Try to have some family time every day on vacation.
Then there is recuperation time. Do you have any relaxing time on your list? Some reading, extra quiet time to think about the year ahead, long walks, or coffee with friends. Add daily recuperation time to your list.
If you don’t enjoy this vacation time, if you have it, then you will start the new year back at work as tired as you left.
How about if you don’t have vacation?
I am self-employed, so I have work to do. I am trying to work less this week, but there is still work. If you have to work this week too, maybe leave most of the home projects and other projects till after the New Year. Enjoy this time with your family & friends and get some evening recuperation time for yourself.
Off to go to the in-laws to celebrate Christmas!
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Photo by: Michael Cory
24 Time Management Tips
Posted by: | Comments24 Time Management Tips
Where does your time go? We all know we are busy, yet we feel behind and don’t get to do the things we really want to do.
Planning is the best time saver there is. At the beginning of the week jot down your goals that you want to accomplish, fun things you want to do, work that needs to be done, and appointments to keep. Then write out a loose schedule for the week ahead, balancing it out between work, family, home, self and your other roles.
You can choose to put your action items on daily to do lists or schedule them on a calendar like appointments. How you keep track of your things to do for the week, depends on how much structure you personally like or need.
When you plan, it is helpful to schedule things for twice as long as you expect them to take. That gives you extra time for those traffic jams, interruptions, and fun, spontaneous moments. I try to plan on leaving 10 minutes earlier than I have to, for all my appointments, in case of unexpected delays.
My weekly planning session usually takes less than thirty minutes. My planning session includes gathering my papers and going through the in-box to find action items. I also plan goals, next action items for my projects, plan a two hour time alone, and plan a date with my husband. I schedule work, exercise, fun time, time with friends and family, volunteer work, and self-care time. Planning allows the important to take precedent over the urgent for once.
But, be flexible with your plan. Remember you are not a slave to your planner. It is there to serve you. If your time management system isn’t working, tweak it.
Here are some more time management tips:
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Know what’s important to you. Figure out your values and your vision.
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Start delegating to family members, co-workers, professionals, and teenagers needing extra money.
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Learn to say no to what is not in your mission or your values.
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Let go of perfectionism. Not everything has to be done perfectly and some things are out of your control.
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Listen to audio tapes during your commute or household tasks.
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Use a planner or phone that includes a daily to do list, a weekly calendar, a monthly calendar, a listing of projects, telephone numbers and important information.
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Empty out your planner of the clutter and junk. Put the little pieces of paper in an in-box to go through in your weekly planning session.
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Keep your planner with you at all times.
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Do not keep a bunch of calendars around. Use only one so everything is in one place.
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Keep a master list of all the things you need to do, call, see, write, etc. Don’t use post-it notes all over. They seem to get lost.
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Answer routine letters by answering them on the original. Photocopy your message for your own files then send off the original.
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Cut down on TV time. Plan your TV time so you only watch the shows you really wanted to see. If you are watching, clean during commercials or sew while viewing.
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Lay out all the things you need for the next day, the night before.
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Tidy your desk before you leave work so it will be clean for the next session.
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Try to spend time on planning and important things so you are not always "putting out fires."
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Use a timer to keep you from spending too much time on one thing or to challenge you when you are cleaning.
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Relax when you are relaxing and work when you are working.
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Make goals and rewrite goals every few months, so you have a focus.
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Clear the clutter from your desk.
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Go through your files once a year to get rid of paper you no longer need. Saves space and time. Or go through a file each time you put something in it, to keep your files current.
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Get rid of things that don’t work, especially pens. Save yourself some frustration.
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Start with the worst item on your to do list. Everything else will be a piece of cake. You also won’t be thinking and dreading it while doing other tasks. Procrastination sucks out your energy.
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Be sure to bring things to do like reading, writing a letter, paying bills etc., when you know you will have to wait someplace.
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A couple of times a year, keep a time log. Jot down everything you do for a day or two. Then examine where your time does not match what is important to you.
It’s your life. If you don’t manage your time, other people will manage it for you.
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If you want to go deeper than just tips, into changing your relationship with time, the class starts Monday:
Float and Flow in Time
Posted by: | CommentsEver notice that some people have super busy schedules but they seem to float and flow? And other people with the same schedules are tight, stressed and feeling overwhelmed?
That’s because schedules and not enough time are not the real reasons people are stressed. Much of the stress is because of their current relationship with time.
Where are you on the spectrum?
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If you are looking to change your relationship to time, check out the class that starts Monday:
Self-Directed
Posted by: | CommentsMany times when I talk to people they tell me they are busy and they don’t know how to stop. They have to take the kids here and here and here. Or work is keeping them overtime. Or they have to attend so many meetings.
The biggest difference I’ve noticed between the "too busy" and the "not too busy" is that for the too busy it’s always someone or something else causing the problem.
"Too busy" is the kind of people that makes you exhausted, irritable and like you are missing meaning. Some people can be rushing around like whirlwinds, but they are feeling fulfilled in their lives and energetic. Too busy will seem much different from one person to the next.
In order to become less busy, you need to be self-directed. You can decide how many activities the kids can be in if you are the one driving. You can decide whether you want to join the PTA or not. You get to decide to be more productive during work time so you don’t have to stay late.
You can make your priorities, true priorities. You can make sure you exercise, connect with someone and have quiet time before you watch TV, go to a game or surf the internet.
Trust me, I realize sometimes things happen. People get sick, your daughter gets married, there is a big project at work. Sometimes you may be busy no matter what. But, if you are always too busy, it’s probably not circumstances. It may be you.
Lots of people use busy as a badge of worthiness. I am busy, so I must matter. When they aren’t moving, they get antsy. Some create crises just so they can save the day or complain to others about the drama. Or they stay busy because they are scared other people will get ahead of them. Or look down on them. Staying too busy can be a way of masking feelings they don’t want to deal with.
Where can you take responsibility for the busyness of your life? What are you willing to do about it?
