After being out three evenings in a row, I told my daughter I was ready to just veg at home for the next few days because as an introvert all that interaction wears me out. She said, "But, you can’t be an introvert. You love people and you talk to them." I had to explain that introversion and extroversion is more about how you get your energy. Not how social you are. Introverts get their energy from alone time and extroverts perk up surrounded by people.

I had to lend her the book I had just finished reading called Quiet, by Susan Cain.

After reading this book, I knew even better how to create a life that matches me and my introverted roots. I was reminded not to plan 3 evenings in a row of social activity or three weekends in a row of visiting friends and family. And that it’s o.k. to have a long quiet time in the morning that doesn’t seem all that productive. I don’t need to go to big networking events. I can network online and in small groups. Or even better one on one. I don’t have to feel badly that I put space between my coaching calls, when the experts say you should do them one after the other.

And if you are an extrovert, make sure you get plenty of outside stimulation. If you work from home, you may want to work at a coffee shop. It’s alright to have daily phone calls with your friends. We don’t have to apologize for being who we are.

Introversion and extroversion are just part of the puzzle. Where else to you get energy? What else lights up your life? Being outside? Reading? Trying new things? Napping? Music?

Plan your life so you can get more of what brings this energy to you. What can you plan in the next couple of days that helps you be who you are?

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3 comments

  • Sage

    I get my energy from being around other people. It’s like my emotions are amplified when I’m interacting with others.

    Thanks for the book recommendation. I’m always looking for thought-provoking books to add to my to-read list.

  • Mary

    This is exactly what I’ve been explaining to those around me lately. I,too, am an introvert who loves to interact with people. I’m just not energized by it. Thanks for the book recommendation. Can’t wait to check it out! m.

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