This is the time of year many are planning, decluttering, deciding to lose weight and really be productive. We want schedules to keep us in line. Maybe a new app (I am enjoying Google Keep). We want to make our x’s in a chain of never missing a day of our new habit.

We think if we just stop being lazy we could have all our goals met. But, laziness isn’t the real monster. The real monster is…

Perfectionism

Perfectionism is alive and well now. It will keep you locked in planning rather than doing because if you do, you might not do it perfectly. It searches out the perfect system to control your life. The minute the schedule falls apart – so do you. It makes you go around in circles wondering what the right thing to do next is or where to start.

Start anywhere. Do a shoddy job. See what happens. Use that feedback to do better.

If you miss a day (like in the Declutter Calendar), see how to make it easier and more likely you will follow through the next day. Don’t use it to give up.

If your goal is so big it is overwhelming, break it down. Then break it down again. Then break it down again until there is almost no resistance. The main resistance will be the perfectionism saying you aren’t doing enough. Tell yourself doing something is better than doing nothing.

Let yourself do just enough. How many times have you forced yourself to go over something so it’s perfect that meant very little in the big picture of your life?

Where is perfectionism blocking you? What haven’t you completed because of perfectionism? Where has the pursuit of perfectionism held back your authenticity?

It’s more important to have good character, to begin things and complete things and to be resilient when things don’t happen as we wish than to be perfect (which is impossible anyway).

How can you be kind to yourself this year and be resilient with the challenges that come your way?

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Having a group with you is also a great way to achieve goals. You can see how imperfect we all are but make progress anyway. If you are wanting to declutter this year, you can join the Declutter Group.

After doing a decluttering group for about 7 years now I have found that almost everyone wants to declutter. But, people rarely make progress. Mainly for these reasons:

• They are overwhelmed by the huge project
• They keep telling themselves they can’t do it
• Excuses like no time or energy
• Doing do much then crashing when you have chronic pain
• Wanting to hold on to things, memories, eras
• Not wanting to deal with emotions that come up with stuff
• Not knowing where to start

Which of these are your main obstacles?

What can you do about your obstacle?

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Need specific help with your obstacle, join the declutter group
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We were talking about information/articles torn out/things printed off the internet in the Declutter Group Monday.

It’s helpful to think about where you go for information when you are ready for it. If you were to plan a party, would you go to your party planning binder or file folder, would you do an internet search or would you go to the library for a book?

If you are creating a garden, or going on a health plan or planning a vacation where do you go for information?

That is the kind of information you keep. That is where you store your information.

I rarely go to any torn out magazine article anymore. I would search the web or my Evernote online notebook. So I keep almost no magazine articles or things printed.

If you automatically go to your binders, then why are you keeping a bunch of folders on your computer?

If you get most of your info from books – make sure those are organized and don’t worry about keeping the paper information glut.

Information is only helpful if you can find it when you need it.

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Photo by Evelyn Giggles

Some experts say making your bed every day brings more discipline and you are more likely to exercise. Some say it’s better to air out your sheets. Some experts say a messy desk impedes work. Others say a clean desk impedes creativity.

If you exercise in the morning, they say you are more likely to make it a habit. Afternoon exercise can give you a lift from the afternoon slump. Evening exercise releases the day’s stress.

Experts can tell you how to be more productive, have the best body and clean your house. But, none of them are you.

What works for you is what works for you. My friend and accountability partner, Marcia, loves the Konmari method of decluttering. That way does not remotely work for me and I teach what worked for me in my declutter class.

Personally sometimes I make my bed and sometimes it’s more like a nest surrounded by books for break time.

My desk is rarely completely cleaned but I clear it off every few days. (Currently though, as it’s the week before show time for the musical I am in and the desk is pretty messy.) But, no matter how busy I am I always put my makeup and grooming supplies away in the bathroom when I’m done. It makes me cringe to see them cluttering the sink.

The good news is there is most likely some expert that says the way you like to do things is the “right” way.  So now you can concentrate on figuring out what works for you. This means experimenting not trying to fit into a mold. Exercise at different points in the day and see which feels best. What breakfast gives you the most energy? Does taking a break every 15 minutes, 25 minutes or 90 minutes keep you on track best? What part of home care needs to take priority because it matters a lot to you or your family?

There can also be multiple ways to live your life as well. I rarely do the exact same morning routine, but the elements are there most days of the week. Some days I like to start with exercise. Some days I like to ease into exercise after some quiet time. One day may have more meditation, one more journaling, one more music. I check in to see what I need most that day.

When situations changed – different marital or children status, new work hours, a health concern, care-giving, etc. then you can experiment again to find what is most helpful in this new situation.

What will you experiment with today?

(Pix from making cards with my daughter the other day)

For many people the craft/hobby room or area is the most difficult to declutter. The #1 thing that holds people back is thinking they are going to finish all the projects in there.

If you declutter a project maybe that means you failed, never finish anything or wasted money.

It could also mean you learned what you needed to from that project, your optional project is no longer fun, or it’s from a different lifetime for you.

Be clear on which projects you actually want to do. It’s also important to know how many more projects you can do. Will you have time to use all those scrapbooking supplies, bushels of yarn or boxes of fabric?

If not, a local school or art center would love your hand-me-downs. I know of a church sewing group that makes things for people that need them.

When inspiration hits, don’t you want a clear space to work? Or do you want to be going through boxes and boxes of stuff? Keeping everything in hopes of an item igniting inspiration often backfires when there is too much stuff. The mind freezes and the creative mojo runs away.

I prefer to buy things for a particular project. I don’t go to Michael’s picking up a bit of this and a bit of that in hopes I will use it someday.

Now this room doesn’t need to be perfect (none of them do). Creative spaces often have a bit of disarray. The question to ask yourself is, “Is this disarray helping or hurting my creativity?”

Now: Maintain

Quarterly decide on your next creative projects. If you are done with (either finished or decided you will not complete) any creative project, declutter the supplies.

When the new year comes one of the resolutions people make is to declutter the house. My declutter calendar is snapped up. This is why I hold my declutter group in January.

But, I don’t want you to declutter to make yourself look better compared to other people’s homes. I don’t want you to declutter to live up to other people’s expectations. I don’t want you to declutter out of a feeling of “not-enoughness.” I don’t want you to declutter to be accepted.

You are enough just as you are. You don’t need to be organized or perfect to be of value.

So, I want you to declutter so you can enjoy your home, have a nurturing space, make your daily routine smoother or to help you accomplish your other goals.

You don’t need to declutter. It’s not a must-do. You only need to declutter if it feels right to you. Not for any outward reasons.

If you do want to declutter maybe you tried some of these before without success:

• Cramming a year’s worth of decluttering into a day with nothing to show for it
• Taking everything out of your closet, getting overwhelmed with the mess and then shoving it all back in a week later
• Going through a pile then making even more piles with your sorting, which never seems to end
• Reading a How to Declutter book, then getting sidetracked after a couple of days
• Energetically tackling an area, then crashing with exhaustion before it was completed
• Decluttering, with almost everything going into a maybe pile
• Making a New Year’s resolution to finally declutter your house, only to find it December and the house looks the same as in January (or worse after a year of added clutter)

I’d love to help you with that. You are invited to join January’s Declutter Group.

One of my email accountability clients reminded me I hadn’t done a video in awhile. Looking at my desk, I knew I had a video to share. My desk was a mess and this is how I cleaned it up. Looking over the video I also noticed a few other spots that needed to be picked up. As you know I am anti-perfection so enjoy this video flaws and all:

Some people asked what I do with the papers I put in my inbox:

Living Room Paper Sort
Action File
Filing System

My son used to make up elaborate schemes to get out of work. He got out of homework when he was about 9 by telling the teacher how overworked he was at home. He told him we make him set up computers and do about 3 hours of chores a night. The teacher felt so sorry for him he let him get away with not turning in homework.

Until the parent-teacher conference and we told him it was more like 30 minutes of chores not 3 hours. Let’s say he was doing a lot more chores than usual during the Christmas break.

Getting out of work is like that. More often than not, we end up doing more work.

Your taxes need to get done and trying to get out of them only leads to more work through an audit.

Deciding to do dishes some other time because you don’t feel like doing the work after dinner only makes the dishes harder.

You wishfully think if you shuffle around that project, it will get done on its own.

We have it in our head that work is bad. It’s not fun, it’s tiring, it’s *grumble, grumble, grumble*. We dig our heels in about how unfair it is that we have to do it. The world is punishing us by making us do it.

Is it really?

Your work is to give people what they need. Work allows you to be useful and provide value to someone else.

We need to look at work differently to release the procrastination habit. We need to believe that work is as good a way to spend our time as relaxing.

When you look on your life, what makes you feel good? For many of us, it’s when we overcame a challenge or made a difference. When we helped someone.

How do you feel after procrastinating or trying to get out of work? Guilty? Low energy?

You can use that brain power you are using to get out of work, to make the work more fulfilling or more fun. Think about the bigger picture of the the organized home that you can invite people to before you clean. Notice how you are helping yourself and others. Work is a privilege and a service to others. Work is how we achieve our goals whether it’s a decluttered house or running a 5K.

Most of us want the results – the clean house, the good income, the excellent blood pressure. Yet, we run away from the work thinking it will be too hard. Will it? Are you up for the challenge of changing how you see work?

Photo by Janet Ramsden

I’ve been reading the life-changing magic of tidying up by Marie Kondo. Since the Declutter Group starts today, I thought I’d read to get some fresh inspiration. But her way of decluttering is definitely not my way of decluttering.

She suggests decluttering in one swoop, get everything organized to perfection and then you will automatically keep it tidy forever. She says it has worked with her clients.

I’ve been running declutter groups for about 7 years now and none of my clients have enough time to declutter all at once.  Decluttering 5 minutes a day can be considered progress.

Since life is not stagnant I don’t think you can organize and declutter everything at once and be done with it.  There are life transitions – marriage, a baby, a loved one’s death, a new job, a new hobby, letting go of projects and ideas of yourself.

Caring for your home is an on-going, ever changing thing.

Caring for your home requires maintenance. Some weeks there will not be enough time for it and you may have to catch up on the weekend. I’d love for people not to feel badly about that.

I want decluttering to feel lighter and more fun. We laugh a lot in the declutter group.

All that said I am still looking forward to continuing reading. It’s important to read things that view things a different way and maybe I’ll pick up some great ideas to share with the Declutter Group.