Feeling not enough?


A​s I was writing about self-mast​ery, I knew I would need to discuss not feeling enough.

A​s you pursue self-mastery and improvement, you may run into the specter of not-enoughness. I talked about making incremental changes and not expecting perfection. But, what if in your quest for self-mastery, you feel not enough. You can’t do it. It’s too hard. It’s too overwhelming.

I know in the self-help world we often hear ways to raise our confidence and self-esteem. I’ve even posted before how you are enough. But, I found a different way.

I was attempting something and was feeling not enough. When I heard in my inner sanctum, “Of course you aren’t enough. That’s what I am for.” I laughed. It clicked. I don’t have to try so hard or be perfect. God doesn’t expect perfection. He knows we are all screwed up.

T​hat’s why forgiveness and grace exists. Which God gives us and we can give to ourselves and other people.

T​here is not a perfect journey to mastery. Step forwards and step backs. Mistakes and regrets. We fail.

T​he Bible is full of people not enough that God was still able to use. God uses our mistakes and weaknesses to show He is enough. He is our strength. Our guide. Our vision. He can use you no matter how unconfident you feel.

W, when you are feeling not enough, instead of trying to manufacture confidence, align with and pray to God. Be the branches to His vine. Allow God to support you. Listen for His guidance. Rest into the unconditional Love. Say sorry. Ask for forgiveness. Give forgiveness to others.

C​an you imagine how freeing it can be to go through life not attempting to be perfect? It’s not a requirement or even attainable in this life. Even the most successful people have risked, failed, and made mistakes. The imperfection is what connects all of us as human.

A​nd a note on “not enoughness.” Most of that feeling comes from society saying you should be thin, beautiful, handsome, strong, organized, financially successful, good, powerful, constantly productive, etc. No one can be enough, with those cultural standards. You may feel judged or that people have those expectations of you. They may have. But, yours is the life God gave YOU. Not other people. Not society.

T​hankfully, cultural standards aren’t God’s standards. How loving are you being? What is your character like in this moment? How connected are you to God and others? Are you listening? Do you serve? It’s never about perfection, it’s about your heart.

Drop the illusion that you can ever be enough.

O​f course, you aren’t enough. But, you don’t have to be. God is enough.

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1 Comment

  • MaryEllen says:

    Beth, you have wisdom way beyond your years. We, who follow you, are grateful and thankful you are part of our lives.
    Bless you and your family.

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