I was on a call last week discussing an event. We all went to the same event. But, the feelings, experiences and recollections of the event were totally different from one another. A big reminder that what we all see is clouded by our feelings, our past, even the last time we ate.
This is important to remember when dealing with other people. What we see as truth, may in fact not be reality. Just because you feel slighted by someone, doesn’t mean they were actually trying to slight you. A rainy day doesn’t necessarily mean bad news. The driver that cut you off? Maybe they didn’t see you. Or were rushing their son to the doctor.
Did you get emotional with your boss because of the actual criticism or because that’s exactly what your Mom used to say? Kid’s arguments can set you off one day, but blow right past you another day.
You rarely get to see the big picture. Will this event turn out to be terrible or the best thing that ever happened to you? You can’t know everyone’s motives or their pasts.
Assumptions are beliefs or ideas that we hold to be true — often with little or no evidence required." – Daniel Kies
How many times have you assumed you can’t do something? Even if you’ve never tried.
And when we are miserable about something, it’s almost always because we think something, some situation or someone should be different than they actually are.
Fighting reality is a hard way to live.
Byron Katie teaches what she calls The Work to question your thoughts and assumptions. The inquiry process is right on her web site: The Work
What thought is making you angry, frustrated or sad? Try The Work on that thought.