For a simpler life, I talk a lot about releasing clutter. But, there are many other things to release to come closer to your simpler life.
- People pleasing. Unless you are willing to disappoint people you will always be living someone else’s life. If you aren’t able to say no to a request because the person will make you feel badly, they aren’t making a request, they are making a demand. We need others to be able to say no to what we ask, and we need to be able to say no to what they ask. Without all the manipulation. Keep reminding yourself it is your life and you have a right to make choices that fit you. If someone tries to guilt you, you don’t need to fall into their trap.
- Striving. Trying to make it happen. Going after society “success” without checking in to see what success means to you. Doing more so you feel enough. Hustling. Overbooking. Over-promising.
- Ego. What will people think of me if I decide not to bake cookies for the bake sale? Can I deal with having someone mad at me? Will I let go of the material things that don’t satisfy the soul, but make me look good, so I can slow down? Letting go of trying to be perfect and allowing people to see imperfect.
- The person I think I am. People are always changing and they can grow. But, if you only see yourself as who you were in the past, it’s much harder to change. “I’m terrible with money.” “I have to be perfect so people will love me.” “I am lazy.” “I am disorganized.” If those thoughts aren’t helpful to you, can you practice better feeling thoughts? “I can manage my money.” “I am human, not perfect.” “I allow rest.” “I have a really organized bookshelf.”
- Tension. All that self-pressure causes tension. But, you can release it by breathing into the tension, dancing or singing it out, doing yoga, shaking body parts, journaling or screaming in the car alone.
- Old hobbies, duties and projects. Do you have ideas, projects, hobbies that you haven’t touched in years, but haven’t allowed yourself to release? Are these things from who you were before? Are you resenting a volunteer duty you have been doing a long time? Are you doing things in your leisure you are bored with? Do you have a project that you have completely lost interest in completing, but keep it because you were told as a kid you needed to finish everything?
- Resistance. I should. I can’t. I don’t want to. Well what do you want to do? Plan to do more of that. If you have something that truly needs to be done yet you have the case of the I don’t wannas, can you infuse the task with more purpose or be more fun? ie I want to do these dishes tonight so I can wake up to a sparkly kitchen and I will listen to music while doing them. Procrastination is a big energy drainer and leads to a more complicated life.
Looking over this list, what one thing can you focus on releasing this week? How would that make you feel? How would it lead to a simpler life?
Hi Berh,
My friend Jo Williams passed on your blog to me and i am so pleased she did. Just reading your simple tips about being in the moment as well as decluttering and letting helped with my “mess” and ways to tackle it.
Welcome Bev. And so glad they are helping.