I was standing in a really long line at the post office yesterday. Most people were settled in and calmly waiting with their packages, though you could tell they didn’t want to be there. A couple people were complaining about other places that were closed that required them to come wait at the post office.

Then the man behind me said, “If this is the worst thing that happens to me today, it’s been a great day!”

As he said that, the atmosphere lifted. People smiled and started chatting.

During this sometimes hectic season we all need a reminder that waiting isn’t the biggest problem to have. We tend to start catastrophizing small inconveniences when we are stressed.

Time to regain our perspective.

Everyone right now is telling you how to do your holidays. What you should do. What you shouldn’t do.

I posted on Facebook, “Black Friday judging is annoying. I don’t do Black Friday because I am an introvert. But, I know many people that love to go with friends and family bargain shopping. So whether you are staying in, going shopping, working or getting outside – enjoy your Friday!”

You can do whatever you and your family want. My uncle’s family does an Indian Buffet for Christmas dinner. I told that to an acquaintance of mine who said, “Oh I could never do that! Everyone wants the homemade meal at home.”

Some families want to buy for everyone as showing love. Others like to pick names and concentrate on one person or family.

So find out what is important to you and what is important to your family? Please ask. Don’t assume. I found out no one cared about the Christmas tree that the cat always tried to chew the lights. We haven’t put one up in years. But, looking at lights is important. The Christmas eve church service and reading the Bible story is meaningful to me.

What part of the holiday annoys you? Does anyone else care much about it? See if you can let go of the annoying parts. Or have the person that really needs it, do it. My artsy daughter took over most of the decorating. (Letting go of control is good practice!)

If not, find a way to make it easier or more fun. Decorate only the living room. Send half the cards now, half at New Year’s. Buy online. Bake cookies with friends and family instead of alone. Wrap presents to your favorite music. And no, it doesn’t have to be Christmas music. Order Chinese. Pay for a hotel.

How about we stop judging others for how they celebrate and not let other’s judgments affect our own holiday? How would you celebrate differently if you concentrated on loving instead of trying to gain love and approval?

How do you do holidays your way?

P.S. Do you want a holiday plan that doesn’t have you do a million things you just don’t have time for? I have my Simple Holiday Plan. It’s bundled with my Simple Annual Plan to help you plan 2016.
http://www.encouragingcoach.com/holidayandnewyearplan.htm

(Pix is me with my card holder.)

I just got back from a local diner that has the best hamburgers around. It’s been there since 1924 and has 50s music playing. The owners and waitresses called many people by name. A grandpa was there with his young grandson. A group of of people that work together put tables together. An older lady hung out at the counter chatting with the owner. The place was very clean. My meal was probably $2 more than it would have been at fast food, but it was worth it to me.

I prefer to spend my money at local shops even if they cost a bit more. As we go into the holiday spending season, where do you plan to spend your money? I would rather get 1/2 a pound of candy at Mainstreet Sweet Shoppe, then get a pound at Sam’s Club. I love to get presents at Out of the Box game store since my daughter goes there on free game nights.

I no longer keep money in a big bank, but instead use a credit union where they welcome me by name every time I enter.

I love it when I can buy something environmentally friendly and chemical free. And I am willing to pay a little more for that.

When you buy less stuff, you can buy according to your beliefs easier.

It’s time to budget for the holidays and start making your lists. What can you buy locally or that aligns with your beliefs?

You can make a difference with your spending.

I read in the reader’s comments in Body and Soul Magazine that the best gift this mom could give to her family and friends is a patient, loving person.

I think our family and friends would rather have us be happy and relaxed, than frantic, abrupt and impatient in the quest for a perfect Christmas. Don’t you?

Photo by MaryLynn Johnson