Use a reminder system to show you care


First Published at Meditate Like a Girl

I know someone who is really good with remembering birthdays, sending cards, asking about something you talked about last time. I always thought it came naturally until I found a binder.

In the binder she had a page for each of her friends with names of their family members, important dates, things they talked about in the last conversation and discoveries of things they liked.

Before they met again, she could glance over and refresh her memory.

I do something similar, but I don’t use a binder. I have information I want to remember in Google contacts. 

Plus, I add people to my to do list. If I see something on Facebook, perhaps her daughter received an award, and I know I will see them Wednesday I can check in with them. Next to “see Carol at 4pm” on my to do list would be “ask about Missy’s award.”  I note in my calendar when people are coming home from trips or have other events so I can ask how it went.

If I talk about something with a friend on our weekly walk, I put in what to follow up on and see how she is doing with it. That reminder goes right next to the walk reminder.

I want people to know I care and listen, so I use reminders to keep them in mind.  If I only relied on my memory, I would miss things important in my friend’s lives.

Birthdays and important dates are in my Google calendar with reminders a few days ahead.

Finally, I have a list of friends and family that has the last time we got together or talked to each other. I have a reminder in my Google calendar to check that list monthly to see if there is anyone I haven’t talked to in awhile. Then I can schedule a call or get together.

Maybe you have a phenomenal memory and don’t need reminders to make your friends feel special. But, some of us need a little system.


  • This is so clever, Beth!!! I’m going to start doing that

    I usually just rely on my (mostly good) memory and email/ SMS/ call that person there and then to check on them.

    However, I do have a “friends” spreadsheet and the total is RED until I see everyone at least once a year 🙂 🙂

    (there’s more nerdy you didn’t know about me)

  • Beth Dargis says:

    Love the spreadsheet idea, Marcia. Of course you know I just run from spreadsheets 🙂

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